Kingdom Hearts Fan Fiction
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This story happens only in Jabba's palace. (I may do Endor, we'll see.) NOTE: the lines of certain aliens that speak alien languages, I translate them into what I'm thinking they're saying, this is not an official translation.

The arrival

Donald, C-3P0, and R2 were walking down a dirt road. "What's the matter 3P0?" Donald asked, "You look worried." "Of course I'm worried, and you both should be too.  Lando Calrissian, Riku and poor Chewbacca never returned from this awful place.  R2 beeped and chimed.  "Don't be so sure, if I told you half the things I've heard about this Jabba the Hutt, you'd both probably short circuit." "Yeah, yeah, yeah." Donald said.  the droids arrived at a large door with many little round shapes all around it.  "R2, are you sure this is the right place?" "Yeah, it says so on my GPS." Donald said holding a small screen in his "hand", if 3P0 had real eyes, he would have rolled them.  "I better knock, I suppose."  3P0 lightly tapped on the door.  "There doesn't seem to be anyone here, let's go back and tell Master Luke."  R2 beeped some more.  One of the round shapes popped up and out came a droid eye.  The droid spoke in Huttese.  "Goodness gracious me." 3P0 said.  The eye recoiled a bit, The eye queried who the party was.  "Um," 3P0 began, "R2-D-Toa, D2-D3oa."  The eye loked at Donald and R2, Donald smiled while R2 chirped in a friendly manner.  The eye yelled something and extended forward as well as extending the spikes on its neck, this caused R2 and Donald to recoil in fear.  The eye inquered who 3P0 was. "Oh, C-3Poa."  The eye said some more things.  "Eh, tuta mishka Jabba du Hutt?"  "Kuja, wanki.  Migh be cassa." the eye laughed and returned into its hole.  "I don't think they're going to let us in boys."  R2 chirped.  "We better go."  R2 beeped something that sounded like "3P0..."  Just then, the door opened.  As soon as the door was above his height, R2 wheeled past the holes in the ground which kept the door shut, Donald cautiously followed him.  "R2, D3!  Wait!  Oh dear." 3P0 said folowing the droids.  It was dark inside, R2 turned on his hologram projector light while Donald extended his "arm" and carried a flashlight.  "R2, D3!  R2, I really don't think we should rush into this."  3P0 looked back and saw a giant spider-like droid carrying a jar in its under carriage with a human brain in the jar!  "Oh!  R2!  R2, wait for me!"  R2 and Donald continued to move forward until R2 accidentally ran into a large man with a pig-like face.  The pig man, known as a Gammorean, growled at R2.  R2 recoiled back and beeped something that sounded like "Wow!  Hello!" the Gammorean growled.  "Just deliver Master Luke and Sora's message and get us out of here."  Another Gammorean guard came up behind 3P0.  "Oh my!  Oh!"  The giant door closed.  "Oh no." 3P0 said.  "What now?" Donald asked.  "Heyoda! " a voice said, a twi'ilek man appeared, he appeared to be in his mid 30s, he wore a black cloak and had his lekku wrapped around his shoulders.  "Dey wanna wanga." the Twi'ilek said.  "Oh my," 3P0 said, "dey wanna wygo." 3P0 bowed as a sign of respect.  R2 chirped something that sounded like "Hi there freak." The man shouted something.  "We," 3P0 began, "we bring a message for your master Jabba the Hutt."  "Day Jabba wanga?"  R2 began beeping excitedly. "And a gift."  A few seconds passed by, "Gift?  What gift?"  R2 beeped something that sounded like "I don't know, why are you asking me?"  "Nay, Jabba no barta." the man said smiling, he walked up to R2, "Eas I oto." He rubbed R2's dome then held out his hand as if expecting something.  R2 reacted negatively, the man continued to say things in his native language, commanding R2 to give him what 3P0 was talking about.  R2 beeped and chirped, 3P0 translated.  "He says that our instructions are to give to Jabba himself."  R2 beped and squawked something that sounded like: "Yeah, yeah!  Only to Jabba, only to Jabba!"  The twi'ilek looked a bit disappointed, he looked at one of the gammorean guards who just growled and scowled.  "I'm terribly sorry," 3P0 said, "I'm afraid he's ever so stubborn about these sort of things."  "Yeah," Donald said, "and it always gets us into trouble."  "Not cha!" the twi'ilek said, the droids followed him.  "R2, D3," 3P0 began, "I have a bad feeling about this."  "Aw be quiet, 3P0." Donald said.

Meeting Jabba/Luke and Sora's message/innitiation/last dance

The twi'ilek led the droids to steps that led into a large room.  "Oh great," Donald said, "steps.  It's in these moments that I really miss my legs."  A guard in a faceless helmet walked up behind R2 and Donald.  "There's a ramp a bit down that way."  "Oh." Donald said, he rotated his head to thank the guard but when he rotated his head the guard was gone.  "Huh.  Let's go R2, 3P0's waiting." the two droids wheeled down to the ramp and then entered the big room, Donald and R2 met back up with 3P0, the threesome came into view of a large dias in the center of the room, on the throne was a large lump of tan flabby skin, that was Jabba, he was smoking a hookah, and had a small aquarium within his stubby arm's reach.  On the throne was a jawa that held a large leaf fan which it used to fan Jabba and the other life form on the dias, a rather attractive green twi'ilek girl, she wore a netted costume which left very little of her exposed, on her neck was a collar with a chain on one part.  R2 beeped in concern.  The twi'ilek man they met outside went up to Jabba's head, "Kavo nopace mi'lord." "Good morning." 3P0 said, R2 beeped something that sounded like: "Hi there fatty."  "Hello." Donald said.  "Dat chua

The strangers

After Oola got eaten by the monster bellow, a blaster was fired.  Jabba turned to see who it was.  Two people in armor came in, one holding a blaster, the other one was taller, holding a spear and a chain with Chewbacca on the end. "We have come for the bounty on this wookie." The one said.  "At last!" Jabba said, "We have the mighty Chewbacca!  Droid!  Get over here!" (keep in mind, even though I type in English, neither party understands each other.) "I am here, your worship.  Yes?"  "I want to pay these two for their wookie."  "The mighty Jabba bids you welcome and will gladly pay you both the price of 25,000."  "25,000 each?"  "No, for the both of you."  "No deal.  We want 25,000 each."  "Fifty thousand, no less." 3PO said to Jabba, the outraged Hutt slammed his arm against 3PO's chest and sent him toppling.  "This guy needs to take some anger management classes." One guard said to the one next to him.  "Shhh." the other said.  "What did I say?"  3PO asked.  "That outrageous PRICE!"  "The mighty Jabba asks why he must pay 50,000."  "Well... because..." the one with the chain said, he held out his left hand, in it was a small ball.  "Because he's holding a thermal detonator!"  Many people and aliens ducked for cover, Boba Fett readied to fire his gun.  Jabba simply laughed.  "These bounty hunters are my kind of scum.  I increse my offer to 35,000 for the both of them."  "Jabba offers the sum of 35 for you to split."  The one with the gun looked at the one with the thermal detonator, "It's better than 12,500 for each."  "Yeah.  We... accept."  The one with the detonator shut the device off.  "They agree!"  Jabba gave off a laugh and Chewie was "escorted" down the stairs to the dungeon.  The guard that made the snark comment about anger management and the one that shut him up both watched, they lowered down the visors on their helmets, it was Riku and Lando!  Chewie was thrown into a cell.  That evening a frog like beast outside watch a little critter as it scampered around, the frog then shot its tongue out and ate the critter.  That night, the bounty hunters were allowed to stay the night but had to leave in the morning.  The taller one went across the stairwell and hit his head on the wind chimes.  He siganlled for the other to follow.  The other did so, they walked up to where Han was, on a wall, frozen in a block of carbonite, typically used to hold tibanna gas, but could also be used to contain hard to train animals.  The taller one hit a button on the control pannel.  The hovering block set down on the ground with a thud.  Damn. the shorter one thought, That must have woken everyone up.  The taller one went to work unfreezing Han, they both watched as his stony figure became flesh again.  Han's body thumped on the dusty ground, the taller one went to help him upwhile the shorter one stood guard.  "Just relax for a moment." the taller one said, "You're free of the carbonite.  You have hybernation sickness."  "I can't see." "Your eyesight will return in time."  "Where am I?" "Jabba's palace." "Who are you?"  The hunter took of his helmet to reveal, he wasn't a he, he was a she!  It was Leia!  "Someone who loves you." she said.  "Leia!" Han said. "Yeah, Kairi's here too."  Han looked like he was ready to hurl, Leia kissed him anyway.  "We've gotta got you outta here, come on Kairi."  Kairi took off her helmet and ran to assist Han.  Then a booming laugh came from, seemingly, everywhere.  "What's that?" Han asked.  Oh no was the look on Leia's face.  The laugh came again.  "I know that laugh."  "My, my," Jabba said, "what a touching reunion this is."  "Hey Jabba," Han said trying to hide Leia behind his back, "look Jaba, I was just on my way to pay you back and I get a little side-tracked. It's not my fault-" "It's too late for that, Solo.  You may have been a good smuggler, but now you're Bantha fodder!" Jabba laughed again, all his cronies laughed too.  "Look-" Han began.  "Get him out of my face!" Jabba said, two guards came up and began to take him away.  "Jabba, I'll pay you triple, you're throwing away a fortune here don't be a fool damnit!"  Leia watched as Han was taken away.  A Gammorean guard and Lando came up to Leia and grabbed her arms, while Riku grabbed Kairi's arms, Lando and Riu began to take Leia and Kairi to the dungeon when.  "Wait!" Jabba said, "Bring them to me."  After all, who could resist having not one, but two lovely ladies?  Jabba thought to himself.  Lando let go as the Gammorean escorted Leia to Jabba, but Riku had to escort Kairi all by himself.  "We have powerful friends," Leia said, "you're going to regret this."  Jabba shrugged the threat off, "I'm sure, but I'll enjoy the pleasure of you're company."  Jabba then let his tongue out to Leia, she recoiled in disgust only to be pushed forward by the pig man.  Jabba also got the attention of Kairi who remained silent and started to gross her out.  "Oh," C-3PO said, "I can't bear to watch."  Riku couldn't either, beneath his mouthless, eyeless mask, he closed his eyes shut and listened for orders, all he heard was Jabba making slurping sounds like a dog and Salicious Crumb laughing... Han walked into the cell, there was water on the floor.  He heard a growl.  "Chewie?  Chewie is that you?"  The wookie ran up, happy to see his friend.  "I can't see pal, what's going on?"  Chewie let out several barks and growls. "Luke?  Luke's crazy, can't even take care of himself, much less rescue anybody."  Chewie let off some more barks.  "A Jedi knight?  I'm out of it for a little while and everybody's getting delusions of grandeur."  Chewie let off some more sounds.  "Sora's coming with him?  Well, now we're all screwed."  Chewie wrapped his long limbs around Han and  started stroking his hair, like a human would to a dog.  "I'm alright pal.  I'm alright."  "Good." a voice said.  "Who's there?"  Chewie let off his fierce growl.  "Whoa, hey, hey it's me."  "Lando?"  "Yeah, I can't come in or the door will lock me in too."  "Where are Leia and Kairi?"  "I uh," Lando had to think fast, he knew what was going on upstairs but didn't want Han to worry, "Leia and Kairi are here?  Where?"  "You weren't upstairs when she unfroze me?"  "No, I heard some commotion and followed the guards that brought you down here." "Oh..."  "I did see your slate empty so I went to the kitchen and grabbed you some food, the best he has for humans."  "Thank you." Han said, Chewie guiding him to the cell door.  Lando couldn't help but smirk, "Chewie," he said, "It's like your his seeing eye dog."  Chewie let off a set of barks that basically meant "Shut up."  Han grabbed the food off the plate and began eating.  "Well," Han said, his mouth half full, he swallowed, "if you see the girls you'll let me know, right?"  "Of course, now hurry up and eat, I've got to go back to work.  Riku and I will check up on you about every hour."  "Riku's here?"  "Yeah, he and I both managed to smuggle our way into here as guards."  Han finished his meal, Lando hid the plate behind his back and began to walk away.  "Hey," Han said, "Lando?"  "Yes?" Lando said turning around.  "Thanks."  "Don't thank me yet.  Riku will be down later."  One day went by, no sign of Luke or Sora.  "Sorry, Kairi." Riku said aloud.  He went back inside, trying to divert his eyes from Jabba's chamber and went down into the dungeon.  "No sign of them." Riku said.  "Damn." Lando said.  "They'll be here soon, I can feel it." Riku said,  "Lando, you'd better get out of here, they'll be suspicious if we're both down here."  "Yeah."  As Lando walked past Riku both exchanged the same worried glance.  The night went by fast, Riku stood watch outside, relieving the first watch.  He took out his macro-binoculars and scanned the area.  He began to feel his heart sink as he didn't see anything again.  Then, he saw them.  Two speeder bikes headed this way, the other guard prepared to sound the alarm but Riku hit him with his Keyblade and knocked him off the wall.  Riku waved at Luke and Sora, they both gave acknowledgment signals back.  Riku ran down the stairs to the door, he overrided the control pannel to the robot eye which shut it down, he then manually opened the door then reactivated the robot.  Riku then stuck to the shadows, running into the audience chamber.  Sora and Luke walked down the hallway in their black robes, two pig guards crossed their axes in their way, Luke used the force to close off their throats, he let go as he and Sora walked past them. All the members of the auidience chamber were asleep, except for Leia and Kairi, both of whom laid slumped in front of Jabba in slave girl ouftis that were little more than golden bikinis with long skirts hanging down in the front, both of them had a collar on their respective neck, in the back was a chain.  Jabba had the individual chains on each of their collars connected to one chain that he held in his one hand.  Both girls were awake, silently hating the hutt for this humiliation, when Jabba would fall asleep, both would apologize prefusely to each other, they both blamed themselves for this.  Kairi wished she could use her Keyblade but the collar she had on inhibited her powers.  Just then, Kairi heard footsteps and looked in the direction of the main entrance, she saw Bib Fortuna ran up the steps.  "You must be the one called Skywalker, Jabba doesn't want to talk to you."  "We must speak with Jabba." Luke said.  "That's just it," Bib said looking back, "Jabba knows what you're here for and he won't bargain."  "You wil take us to Jabba now."  "I wil take you to Jabba now."  "You sereve your master well."  "I serve my master well."  "And you will be rewarded."  "And I will be rewarded."  Sora looked at Jabba and noticed one of the girls reclining in front of Jabba.  "Kairi!"  Luke held out his hand stopping Sora from advancing, Sora just ran around Luke's arm, jumped up in the air, threw off his cloak and landed directly in font of Jabba's dias.  "Hey you big slug!  Let Kairi go!"  "Sora-" 3-PO began.  "Sora-" Luke started.  "Sora get ba-!" Kairi began, he then yanked the chain and sent both girls flying back.  "Fool!" Jabba said pressing a button on his throne.  The grate on the floor Sora was standing on fell out fom under him and caused him to fall into a pit.  "Sora!" Kairi shouted.  Riku and Lando looked worried, Luke looked around and saw that he was surrounded by goons.  Luke cursed under his breath then jumped down the hole, the rush of wind caused a pig guard to lose his balance and fall down.  Kairi and Leai leaned forward, stretching the limits of their chain.  Riku and Lando ran up to Kairi and Leia, respectively, and grabbed one of their arms as if to assure them that everything will be alright.  Down bellow, the three victims began to stand up.  Topside, Jabba was laughing to himslef and lightly yanking on Leia and Kairi's chain.  "Tibi Jedi, Tibi Jedi!" Jabba said as the dias moved forward.  Down bellow, Sora and Luke noticed the bones and smell of blood and death.  The giant iron door on the other end of the room began to raise up, slowly.  The pig man knew what was going on and began to try to climb up the dirt slide, it didn't work.  A giant monster began to emerge from behind where the door was.  "What is that?!" Sora yelled.  "A rancor, stay calm." Luke said calmly.  The monster lumbered towards the pig man who was panicking so hard, he probably could have died just from that, but he didn't, he was forced to watch as the monster popped him face first into its mouth and ate him.  "Sh-" Sora began. Up above, Leia and Kairi looked at Lando and Riku, respectively, with worried looks.  Down bellow, the monster began to lumber towards Luke and Sora.  Luke grabbed a large bone from a fallen victim.  "Move!" Sora shouted, too late.  The monster grabbed him and Luke in both of its hands.  Sora summoned his Keyblade, the monster opend its mouth ready to eat two meals for one grab.  Up above, Kairi and Leia recoiled in disgust and worry.  Luke jammed the bone into the monster's mouth while Sora shoved his Keyblade in.  The monster dropped them both, Sora saw it beginning to close its jaw and summoned the Keyblade from its mouth.  Sora readied to battle.  "Don't bother." Luke said.  "What?  Why?"  "It's natural body armor is too thick for blasters, much less your Keyblade."  Sora and Luke ducked for cover under a bunch of rocks.  The monster reached under the rocks.  Luke, thinking fast, grabbed a rock and slammed it onto the monster's finger.  The monster recoiled in pain, Luke and Sora made a break for the holding pen.  When they got in, Luke opened the door, only to be blocked by a gridded gate door.  Luke and Sora struggled against the door, but to no avail.  The kepers shoved Luke and Sora back into the rancor's reach.  Top-side, all of Jabba's goons were cheering, Kairi and Leia struggled against their chain to try to see their friends. Luke saw the manual switch for the giant door, if he could just make it in time...  Luke grabbed a skul and threw it at the pannel causing it to sparp and the door to fall onto the rancor.  It's over. Luke thought.  Then he saw the monster get up move the door off of its head into the ceiling.  The skin around where the door spikes hit was cracking, then all of its skin cracked to reveal black skin with glowing red eyes.  "A Heartless hybrid!  Don't let him eat you or he'll steal your heart!" Sora yelled.  "Now your keyblade should work on him, right?"  "Right!  Leave it to me!"  Sora went to work cutting the monster down to size, until he could release the hearts it had stolen.  The black skin began to disapate, until the rancor's real skin was left.  The rancor looked at Luke and Sora with a thankful look in its eyes, fell down and died.  "You're welcome." Sora said.  The keepers barged in and started to attempt to hurt Sora and Luke, until a big man came and seperated them.  He saw the beast he took care of for a long time, dead. Top-side, Leia and Kairi were smiling at their friend's victory, Jabba, outraged, yanked their chain so hard it sent them flying against his stomach. Both layed against his stomach groaning as Jabba wouldn't let up. "Bring me Solo and the wookie!" Jabba yelled, "They will all suffer for this!"  Riku and Lando headed downstairs.  Riku and Lando brought Han and Chewie up while an unamed guard brought Luke and Sora up, the guard had also taken Sora's Keyblade away and was wearing it on his belt.  "Han!" Luke said. "Luke." Han said.  "Are you alright?" "Fine, together again, huh?"  "Wouldn't miss it."  "How we doing?"  "Same as always."  "That bad, huh?  Where's Leia and Kairi?"  "I'm here." Leia said, Jabba was pulling on her and Kairi's chain, stroking Leia's shoulder.  "Stop talking." Jabba said to everyone present, "droid, tell them."  "Oh dear." 3PO said, "His high exaltedness, the great Jabba the Hutt, has decread that you are to be terminated, immediately."  "Good," Han said, "I hate long waits."  Salicious laughed.  "You will, therefore," 3PO began, "be taken to the Dune Sea and cast into the Pit of Carkoon.  Nesting place of the all powerful Sarlacc."  "Doesn't sound so bad." Han said.  "In his stomach you will find a new definition of pain and suffering,"  As 3PO said this Jabba pulled on the girl's leash and touched Leia's back.  "as you are slowly digested over a thousand years."  Chewi roared.  "On second thought," Han said, "let's pass on that, huh?"  "You should have bargained, Jabba." Luke said.  "Take them away!" Jabba said.  "That's the last mistake you'll ever make." Luke said being escorted out.  Jabba laughed and pulled the girl's chain sending them onto his stomach, he then stroked Leia's shoulder again.  As Luke and the others went outside, they saw three skiffs and one huge landship.  Sora looked back at the palace and saw Jabba's dias hovering out from the entryway, still with Kairi and Leia.  "Kairi..." Sora said softly.  Riku came up behind him and gave him a shove with his spear.  "Shut up and keep moving, skuz!"  Sora continued to walk towards the smaller skiff that Luke, Han, and Chewie were on.  Riku leaned in towards Sora.  "Don't worry, everything will be fine."  Sora got on the skiff.  All the landships flew through the desert at a relatively slow speed. On the barge, Kairi and Leia were each at a window, looking at the skiff their friends were on, Jaba yanked their chain just to remind them who's boss.  Kairi looked at Leia.  "I'm sorry about this, Your Highness."  "No," Leia said, "I'm sorry.  I should have guessed he was suspicious about us."  Kairi looked depressed.  "Don't worry, Kairi." Leia said, "We can't stay like this forever."  Leia raised a hand up as if readying to touch Kairi's shoulder, but then Leia felt that that would feel weird. On the skiff Han striked up a conversation.  "I think my eyes are getting better.  Instead of a big dark blur, I see a big light blur."  "There's nothing to see." Luke said, "I use to live here you know."  "You're going to die here." Han said, "Convienient." "Just stick close the Chewie, Riku and Lando.  I've taken care of everything."  "Oh, great." Han said, "But it could be worse, I guess.  Sora could have planned what you're planning."  There was silent laughter among the friends.  On the barge, Jabba yanked the girl's chain so hard it sent them flying towards him, they tryed to pull back but Bib Fortuna put his hand up against their backs.  Jabba held a goblet up to Leia.  "Soon you will lear to appreciate me." he said.  Kairi noted the drink, it looked like it was a Coca Cola glass, with Coca Cola in it.  The servants insisted it was wine.  R2 and Donald went around the interior of the barge with a tray of food and drink on their "necks", C-3P0 ran into R2 who then stopped and Donald ran into him, both the droid's trays fell onto the floor.  "Hey!" Donald shouted, "What's the big idea, buddy?!"  "I'm terribly sor- R2, D3, what are you two doing here?"  "Wht's it look like we're doing?  We're serving drinks." Donald replied.  "Well I can see that but this place is dangerous.  They're going to execute Master Luke, and if we're not careful, us to"  R2 replied with a series of beeps.  "Hmm," 3P0 said, "I wish I had your confidence." The barge and skiffs slowly came to a stop, they had arrived at their destination.  The skiff with Luke, Sora and the others hovered over a large pit with a beak shaped thing coming out of the center and large tentacles and teeth all around the edges.  Inside the barge, Jabba kept Leia and Kairi's chains short.  "Tell them!" Jabba bellowed, 3P0 grabbed a large microphone, Leia gripped and un-gripped her fists.  "Victims of the almighty Sarlacc, his Excellency hopes that you wil die honorably.  But should any of you wish to beg for mercy, the great Jabba the Hutt will now listen to your pleas."  R2 and Donald began wheeling to the top deck.  "Tibi Jedi." Jabba said.  "3P0!" Han said, "You tell that slimy piece of worm ridden... filth, he'll get no such pleasure from us!"  In the barge, 3P0 turned to Jabba, possibly repeating the message.  "Jabba!" Luke yelled up to the barge, "This is your last chance, free us or die."  On the barge, Jabba and his cronies began laughing at the Jedi's threat.  "Move him and the Keyblade wielder into position!"  Sora was escorted over to the second skiff

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